the Moon is very, very dark in capricorn right now, preparing for a renewal. I’m looking at the chart and thinking how incessantly amazed I am by the perfection of the rhythms and patterns. at the time of the new moon (Thursday at 6:57am est) in my location there’s a first house stellium in capricorn: Mars, Moon, Sun, and Pluto. this lunar moment is a gesture to the end of Pluto in capricorn, almost like a Going Away party. it’s a very earthy moment, with Jupiter in taurus amplifying everything in capricorn. Saturn in pisces is bringing a little gentle moisture to give the energy a texture almost like clay.
you could make anything.
you could unmake everything.
I don’t think we’ve given enough credit to Pluto in capricorn for how it’s brought a subversive confrontation of dogma. Jupiter, who we could look at as having a tendency towards dogma when underdeveloped, is really uncomfortable in capricorn. this is what we call “fall” according to the ancient schema of exaltation. to me this implies that when we try to scale up dogma (or even less rigid beliefs) we build a jenga tower, one which will inevitably tumble. and tumble it absolutely has. you can still see many of the wooden pieces flying through the air while others try to stabilize in increasingly precarious positions.
the understanding I’m translating from Jupiter’s fall in capricorn is that worlds can’t be built from dogma. dogma is defined as rules laid out by an authority figure and considered to be incontrovertible true. as much as I don’t like to rely on stereotypical words to describe signs, capricorn is a building environment. earthy, initiatory, structured. but capricorn is not as rigid as we might imagine. it is a cardinal sign after all, a sign pointing towards the moment everything changes, towards when the first foundation is laid and when the whole thing comes tumbling down. the alpha and the omega.
what feels so clear to me in this moment is that we have been focusing on the destruction, the decay, the composting that has been Pluto in capricorn transforming the realm of how worlds are built (which is different then why or what world). but while we’ve been looking in the direction of all the pieces falling down, what we may not have noticed is that a new foundation has been created. the world has changed. there are movements and awarenesses and pivots that have shifted the way people think on an unthinkable level.
something new is emerging from the compost.
in a personal sense, I feel aware of how fundamentalist dogmas I hold about myself and my reality hold me back from increasing my capacity to feel limitless. they hold me back from worldbuilding, from seeing the growth out of the compost of my past. I’m gaining a more and more subtle awareness of the residues of these dogmas laid out by the authority figure that is my Controller self. I’m being as compassionate as I can while also reinforcing my commitment to my own movement forward, deeper, wider into my life. I know that even my perception and attachment to my past can become a prison— in many ways, it already has been.
I’m relaxing and dropping layers of seriousness and fear that have been baked into my concept of what it looks like to embody integrity. integrity is so, so easy to conflate with correctness, rightness, perfect responsibility. but I’m not interested in perfect responsibility. I’m interested in radical responsibility and I can’t get to the radical (root) of anything that I cannot understand, and I cannot understand what I will not accept. dogmatic ideas about integrity, or anything else for that matter, keep me from my full range of (e)motion and sight. if I can’t realize I’m experiencing something then I can’t even begin to accept it.
this is why opening our awarenesses beyond ideas and into the primacy of our direct experience, our concrete reality which is our subconscious in solidified form, is so important. the less we are trying to solidify around ideas of ourselves or the world, the more we can actually build and become.
my question for you is: what if integrity increased your softness, not your rigidity? what if integrity isn’t a fundamentalist approach to being the self or navigating reality, but rather a flexible one?
this new moon feels like a reminder that being afraid to look like a Fool will actually take you out of integrity way quicker than being willing to be One. being willing to be a Fool will ensure that you’re willing to learn and be uncomfortable and THAT’s what integrity is about. anything else is just posturing and will decay.
I’m designing tomorrow night’s group Timeline Jump to connect us more deeply with the version of ourselves who embodies this kind of grounded, soft integrity. it’s giving The Great Defrosting in a Timeline Jump form. Dream Realm members can sign up below.
p.s: speaking of being the Fool, I got struck by Uranian lightning and restructured Worldbuilding School 2.0 less than two weeks before it begins! the planetary ancestors wanted more spaciousness to move through me— that meant a price drop, too. come learn not only how, but why and what world you’re building. enrollment is open until January 20.
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